I have so many things to tell you all and I don’t want to make separate blogs for them so I am cramming it all into one glorious overload of information about all kinds of malarkey. My weekend started off on a pretty sad note and before I get into it I just want to post this little disclaimer : I don’t want you to be sad for me. I don’t want any “Oh poor baby” shit, I am fine. I am totally o.k and deal with stuff like this very well so I am just sharing with you guys. Don’t be sad 🙂 So Saturday my Grandmother passed away. She was my mother’s mother. I just lost my other Grandmother a few months ago too so now I am officially without any grandparents. When my grandma Isabelle passed a little while back I was devastated because not only was this the first time I had ever dealt with the death of a loved one but she practically raised me. She lived with us from the time I was born until I was about 17 years old so losing her was like losing my mom.
This time around when my Grandma Elaine died I was sad but not as much for a few reasons. The main reason I was not that sad was because she was suffering everyday. She had a cerebral aneurysm about 4 months ago and has been getting progressively worse since it happened so to hear that she is finally resting and no longer in pain is a relief to me. I also know that she was a very VERY religious woman so she was not afraid to die. She knew it was coming and she was ready to go be with my Grandpa again which is what she truly believed and I find comfort in that. More than anything I was sad for my mom. I was already on my way to my parent’s house on Saturday when my brother called me to tell me what happened and I was fully prepared to show up and be a pillar of strength. I convinced myself that I was not going to cry and I was going to be strong for my mom and just hold her while she cried. That didn’t quite work out lol As soon as I came in the door she looked over at me with her puffy red eyes and sobbed “Oh my peanut!!” and just started bawling in my arms so of course that broke me. One of my parent’s nicknames for me is peanut cuz well..I have a peanut shaped head. On a more serious note, I must say that I have never been so heartbroken as I was upon seeing my mother’s face that day. There are no words to explain what it feels like to see your mommy in that kind of pain and not be able to do anything about it but hug them and tell them it will be o.k eventually. It killed me. I just kept telling her all the cliche things like “she isn’t in pain anymore” and “she is with grandpa”. What else do you say? There are really no words in the English language that makes the death of your loved one seem less horrible so all you can do is provide comfort and a shoulder to cry on. She is in Minnesota right now with the rest of my family and I wish I could be with her 😦 But as I said before, don’t be sad for me because I am fine. I deal with death pretty well.
Now onto a more light -hearted topic, I did my first photo shoot last night!! Usually when I say I’m taking pictures it involves me in my bathroom mirror taking self shots of my ass while my cat walks around in the background but this time someone else was taking pictures! It was all for a clothing company that was in town for the Magic Clothing Convention and a buddy of mine from LA works for them so when he asked if I would model their stuff I say yes. Actually, I’m pretty sure I said “fuck yes” but that is beside the point. I was just excited to have my picture taken with a camera that wasn’t attached to a cell phone. It was a nice change. There is a bit of a weed theme to the clothing too so it was perfect for me. Not only that but the logo is a V. Oh yes, V for VUKO! (vuko isn’t really the actual name of the company but how rad would that be, right?) After taking the pics we smoked a blunt and I gave my boy a ride to the MGM. Now..we were supposed to be there to pick up ONE dude. Just one. But when we got there I had 5 half drunk dudes bombard my tiny Kia and they proceeded to pile into my car. It was pretty funny actually, seeing 5 grown men try to squeeze into my backseat. I had me and Aaron in the front, 3 dudes in the back seat and 2 dues in the hatch back portion of my car. Packed, yes? After they all got in we headed over to the Palms since that was were they were going to be partying that night. If you have ever been to Vegas you know that when driving down the Strip there is always that one car that is full of people and the car itself is bouncing up and down as the people inside dance to the blaring music that is pouring out of the open windows. I was that car last night and it was such comedy. One of the dudes even busted out a rap on the way to the Palms about “being in the back of Vuko’s car in Vegas”. It was pretty magical. I dropped the kids off at the Palms, thanked Aaron for being so awesome by taking my pics, then went home to wash off the pound of makeup I had on. I was pretty hyper when I got home that night so I just smoked a bowl and watched Dawn of The Dead until the sleep was upon me. I don’t have any pictures of the shoot but when I get them, you bet your sweet ass I will post them here. And on Tumblr. And…Twitter cuz I just can’t help myself. All I have is a picture of the neat stickers I got for the clothing brands.
OH! I almost forgot, when I went to my parent’s house Saturday my mom had a bunch of pictures in a box for me to check out and here are some of the gems from that box.
And I got this neat little friend in the mail from one of my AWESOME twitter followers that like to buy me crap that I am too cheap to buy myself.
And that just about covers it. I have had a very interesting past couple of days. I’ve gotta say I feel bad posting a picture of a diamond butt-plug in the same blog that mentions my family but I think they would understand lol My mind is always jumping from one random topic to another so my blog might as well reflect that 🙂 I hope you all have an awesome day! Thanks for reading.