Just The Girl Next Door (if she hunted zombies and watched porn)

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Vuko-Venture: The Adventures of Vuko March 8, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — vukizzle @ 9:31 pm

As most of you know, I live in Las Vegas Nevada. This city is full of amazing things to see, and endless excitement for people of all ages. What most don’t know is that in the area surrounding Vegas we have quite a few natural wonders to see as well as the man-made objects of art that can be found in the city. Several national parks including Red Rock and Lake Mead can be found just outside of the bustling metropolis, and offer a break from the non-stop action in town. I, being a local, have been to almost all of these places but still manage to find hidden gems sometimes, like Floyd Lamb State Park. I came across this place when searching for a park to go fly my Spiderman kite. Oh yes, I still fly kites. It’s one of life’s simple pleasures 🙂 But I digress. I didn’t know which park to visit so I simply googled “Best parks in Las Vegas” and the first one to come up was FL state park. Having never been there I was intrigued so I packed up my kite, my weed, and my boyfriend and headed out to see what kind of park this would be.

Upon arriving at the destination (after some minor direction issues) the first thing we saw was a peacock just hanging out in the parking lot near some bushes.

I’m always excited to see these birds because they are so rare in Nevada and soo darn pretty 🙂

After parking, we decided to just walk around the entire park and check everything out since that’s really the best way to see everything. I left my kite in the car because sadly the wind had died down by the time we got to the park *sad panda*. This park is not only huge but has 4 separate ponds which are all fully stocked for fishing which is awesome given my love for lakes/ponds/rivers. Naturally with all the water there were many ducks and geese there as well, like this guy who looooves Cheetos.

As we were feeding Cheetos to the fat-fatty ducks we noticed a group of 3 ducks, chasing down one of their fellow duckies. This was curious so I continued to watch and to my surprise I was witnessing a duck gang rape. I just had to take a picture of this so here it is:

As you can see from the picture above, the rapist duck has pinned down the lady duck and the rapist duck’s friends are standing around the chaos, cheering him on as though it were a scene from the movie The Accused.

After the horrible scene of duck on duck violence, we moved on to another pond where I got this beautiful shot:

The water mixed with the trees and the snow on the mountains in the background make me love this picture. However, after I took the picture a couple walked by my boyfriend and I so we said “Hello” to them. Actually my boyfriend said “How are we doin today folks?” then the girl glanced at us from the corner of her eye as if to say “how dare you speak to me”, then kept walking without saying a word. This of course angered me so I turned in her direction and said “Oh really bitch?” then my boyfriend grabbed my arm and gave me the “It’s not worth it” look so I mellowed out and went on with my lovely day at the park, refusing to let that sack of whores ruin my day 😀

The park was full of interesting things to look at like this, which is actually pretty darn creepy since you can’t see what’s in the water and there may be some kind of water-zombie or something hanging out in there:

Here’s a picture of me and my lover standing next to the creepy/water-zombie infested pond:

As we were leaving I saw this cute little scene:

The boy in the picture was feeding the goose a slice of bread when the goose got a little over-excited and kinda started to chase the boy. The boy ran as though he couldn’t just kick the dam bird but it’s nicer and more PETA friendly to run like a bitch I suppose 😛

All in all it was a wonderful day. It’s really nice to just get out of the house and soak up some fresh air every now and then. Especially living in a city like Vegas where I am so used to concrete and fake trees, it’s extra nice to be able to go and enjoy nature, even if it’s just a state park. Oh and we got a sweet picture of my thong hanging out while I was feeding ducks so here you go. TREASURE IT! lol

 

Escalator To Heaven (Stairway Currently Out Of Order) March 1, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — vukizzle @ 7:05 pm

A question that I find I get asked quite a bit is one that everyone discusses or ponders at some point or another, the question of life after death or the lack there-of. Now seeing as I don’t believe in having a religion and prefer to keep an open mind and accept different ideas, most people automatically assume I believe that when you die you rot in the ground and that’s all folks. This couldn’t be further from the truth. When I was young and ignorant I just had faith in what everyone else did: that God was some bearded ethereal being watching our every move and that one day I would fly up to heaven and chill on a cloud with Beethoven and Jimi Hendrix. As I became a teenager I started to be more self aware and question this convenient little ending layed before me. At first this was a scary process for me because I didn’t know what happens. NOBODY does and that in itself is scary. It’s secure and comfy to have all the answers and to know what to expect but when it comes to death not only do you have no idea when it’s going to happen to you but what happens afterwards?? There is nothing more frightening to me than to think that when you die it’s like flipping off a light switch. Darkness. Nothingness is my worst fear. To think that all that I am doing now and have done in my life has been for nothing, what is the point of doing anything then? To enjoy the now? Why make the most of the present when there is no future. But now i’m starting to ramble, so let’s get back to the real topic.

As an adult, and I use the term “adult” loosely when it comes to myself, I now have a pretty good idea of what may happen to me when I kick the proverbial bucket. Thanks to National Geographic I know for a fact what will happen to my physical body, what with all the embalming and rigamortis, but I am more concerned with what makes me ME. No, not the frontal lobe but the “soul” . The spark of life. Call it what you will but its all the same thing. There is no doubt in my mind that something other than cells and matter make us who and what we are. On a molecular level there is no difference between a living body and a dead one, it’s just missing the energy that kept the machine running. One of my favorite things to tell people is the first rule of thermodynamics: ‘Energy cannot be destroyed, it can only be redirected’ so where does our energy go? Maybe it gets recycled into something else like the life force of a plant or even another animal with no memory of it’s previous life since the memories were stored in the brain that was left with the rest of the former body. Things like out of body experiences and DMT trips make me believe that there is more of an actual afterlife than simply moving on to another body kind of situation. Most people are just confused, because you hear folks who have had near-death experiences always say the same thing “Bright light, tunnel, life flashed before my eyes” but all of these events are easily explained with logical and scientific reasoning. There are however stories that cannot be debunked by scientific reasoning like the story of the man who was being operated on and claimed to be viewing the operation from above the table. At first I laughed and assumed this guy was a bum who wanted attention but as I got more into the story it got weird as the man described a strange thing the doctor did. At several points during the operation the man claims to have seen the surgeon stop, place his hands on his upper chest as though he was making wings and moved his torso around to stretch out so that he didn’t tense up during surgery. The man’s eyes were taped shut and a sheet was up to ensure the man wouldn’t be able to see what the doctors were doing to him so how could he have possibly seen this bizzare move of the surgeon? Sure, it could be a hoax. I realize that, but there are many other stories like this and I can’t help but feel they are telling the truth. Listening to people like Joe Rogen explain his experiences with the drug DMT is another reason I feel there is something else. People who take DMT all experience a similar trip: They claim to go “home” to another plain of existance. Many people claim seeing beings as though there are other dimensions with people watching us like a reality show. There are just so many possiblities out there, it’s impossible to have a set faith. It seems silly to me to beleive in one thing so strongly you will kill for it even when it can’t ever be proven to be true. And what if we do go to some form of heaven? I doubt it will be clouds and rainbows but probably more of a personal place based on you and what you desire. It could be based upon the way you lived your life. Maybe that’s what it is, we each experience a different afterlife based upon the way we lived our life in the mortal shell. If you lived your life being boring and taking joy from working hard then heaven for you is eternity at a desk doing data processing and if you lived it up and partied through life then your heaven will be doing endless lines of blow of a hookers ass at LIV nightclub in Miami. Who really knows though? I sure as shit don’t and I really doubt you do either. There is no Idiot’s Guide To Understanding Death but we aren’t meant to understand it, more to just accept it as an inevitability and make the most of what time we do have in this body. So stop being a dick and go make someone smile! 🙂